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Sunday, July 31, 2005
i've bought a lovely necklace with ngeeshin... hehe... c my necklace...  is only rm39 at island... hehe...  * i have some friends that just broke up with their bf/gf... and somes having problem for ther relationshipis... every time i feel their broken hearts form words or voices... it broke my heart too.. what can i do for them? tat's life... no one can always be wif any one forever... although i wish some ones i love can always be with me oso.. i'm scare... jian drafted on 5:29 PM Saturday, July 30, 2005  lulu!!! happy 3rd month anniversary!!! thanks for always being there for me... muacckkzzz... love ya!!! 
jian drafted on 12:24 PM Friday, July 29, 2005 ohh!!! my gastrick is back!!! and i have no food-longing... i don't feel like eat any thing... da worse part is i cant even finished a plate of mee... jian drafted on 10:36 AM Thursday, July 28, 2005 There i received another message from him. He is angry i think and im not worth to cause him angry either, from what he said "You are not even worth to be a friend anymore, what a disappointment". Meanwhile, i think he has misunderstood for what i wrote laz week. I never pointing out his weaknesses, if i really want to, he should clear bout what he did before and make me sad. Every one treats his/her girl/boy friend in different ways. He satisfied his gf by sending presents is not wrong, and there are a lot of girls do hope their bf can treat them in that way. What i mean just what i needed is not only presents. I really think that he was totally out of his mind when he send me the messages i received for this few months. I never post them here just because they might hurt him too much if i do so. I just trying to be nice and maintain the friendship btwn us. But is quite unfair every time i received some messages that rude to me or wrote something bad to me, and i just keep quiet and forcing my self not to fight back just because i think we can still be friend. And if he really wants to maintain the friendship with me, then why i cant feel it from the messages i have received but only feel rudeness and insult? So, maybe is really not worth to be friend anymore. Is quite sad to lose a friend, but what can i do? I'm not owing him a debt of kindness.
jian drafted on 12:16 PM Wednesday, July 27, 2005 "all insane" who is one of my bradasss... he was dead asleep in class today... c... what partner and ping did to him... First, they took photo with him like he is an animal at zoo...  Then, they started to took some meaningful pictures... Die for ciggies... (tak nak!!!)  Die for money...  He told us that he was dreaming bout something important when we taking his photos... but after wake up and being crazy with us... he forgot his dream... if he only found out his dream is actually telling him bout the lottery result after few days, we will kill him... kekekeke~ however, we do love him... mwahahaha~ ohh... nope... we love his brain... ;p And i've took some photos of myself... 
jian drafted on 6:52 PM Tuesday, July 26, 2005 partner: angelelala ask me if i like u anot.. jian: y ask this kind of question? girls... jian: i like u coz u r my partner... kekekek... partner: i explain liao... so tired... jian: wtf she asking? i hate this kind of girl... always ask this kind of stoopid question then now comes to the group conversation partner: explain to her... hehe.. she said i m ur boy boy girl(cant say her name): u dumped the b4 1?(talking bout my ex) partner: ofcoz lerr... partner: hey jian... tell her la... i hard to explain jian: y i supposed to explain to her? i mean we r really nothing girl: okie jian: thn y we shud explain so much when other doubt at us? girl: no need to explain la.. i not need ur explain oso... jian: sorry for what i said juz now... ofcoz i love partner.. he is my partner wat.. kekekeke~ partner: later ppl misunderstood us worr girl: ok ok... stil the same thing jian: partner... don think so much la.. as long as ur gf not thinking like tat.. summore i know her... girl: if my bf like that i will kill him jian: partner.. my bf wont kill u... i asked him b4... he said he quite happy tat i always b wif u guys... partner: y happy? means he look down on me izizit? jian: nola... coz he knew we wont be together de... at least i wont fall to u... kekekeke~ partner: i die oso wont fall for u... girl: ahahaha jian: so is better tat i always b wif u gys than others... jian: ur gf shud think like tat oso... i even help u sent flower for her... partner: my gf knew i wont fall for long hair gal mer..muahaha jian: mwahahaha~ girl: sujian... y change a new bf? then trc need change a new gf oso? partner: coz old bf no good partner: not hansem enuf partner: she change bf like changing bra jian: smack!!! girl: u treat ur bf nice? jian: ofcoz la... girl: new 1.. how? jian: i tell him how i love him every day jian: he treats me like a baby... girl: u r pamper waht jian: i love da feeling of being take care from him girl: the previous 1 leh? hoe old of him? when u getting married? partner: i love the feeling when i smoke partner: when she pregnant jian: smack!!! partner: den ask me be the daay jian: buy condom for u k? partner... partner: i dun use ger larr.. partner: not reality if use girl: 18 sx partner: who cares? jian: mwahahaa~ girl: u all...r bad partner: ppl survey said...10 hansem guyz..9 also din use condom jian: y bad? girl: bad la... jian: this is how we talk always wat girl: no... i mean the thing u all done :P girl: really or not? jian: hey... girl: having sex? jian: u r not blow 18 wat girl: sex? partner: haha angela...now u now y v kenot chat...coz different chanel partner: different channel girl: below 24 jian: haiz... pls... girl: yayayaya jian: adult partner: wanan know true anot arr...come ask us face to face lar.. jian: ya... girl: ask what? partner: i know everything bout sujian...n so do her..hehe jian: we can talk bout sex n period of women any times... mwahahaha... partner: n condom while having lunch girl: that means u all open minder? girl: on sex? with bf/gf? partner: dunno lerr... kenot answer u dis...until u tune into our channel 1st jian: wahahaha~ wrong channel that girl has left the conversation... what can i say? can i ask this kind of people go back kampung and stop bother bout other people stuff? toodles... jian drafted on 8:25 PM Monday, July 25, 2005 happy birthday!!! mom... Happy birthday to mommy!!! It took me quite a long time to think what birthday present actually daddy n mommy wished to have. It's not like my bro and sis, they can be very happy when they have got something can buy by using money. I can't use money to buy mom and dad anything because that's their money. What can i do is treat them nicely and ofcause i swear i will buy them whatever they want when i can earning my own money. I will spent sometimes to travel with them every year since they don't like to stay at home always. Anyway, today is my mom birthday, but they bought me a new hand phone laz nite. "sui lui, u r the one who supposed to buy her a present" comes to my mind. Happy birthday!!! mom... jian drafted on 11:42 AM Saturday, July 23, 2005 dear baby inno, hmm... ur memory is corrupted... u lost all my photos n songs... anyway.. i stil needed u... so pls... don turn off urself... i pressed da "on" button for more than hundred times to keep u on today, im frustated... love, ur stoopid owner ;( jian drafted on 9:09 PM i have midterm exam for maths tomolo (not tomolo, is this morning)... lulu called me when i tot he suppose shud b sleepin... im so touched... i love lulu!!! muacckkzzz... jian drafted on 1:52 AM Friday, July 22, 2005 photos b4 presentations...   lulu n partner like my ol look...  wif my poor dog laz nite... 
jian drafted on 5:34 PM Thursday, July 21, 2005 I have a presentation tomorrow, it freaks me out... that's moz of the IT students problem. They afraid of presentation because they are not used to it, just like me. Ok, i should be relax and don't think so much. Hm... one more thing, i have received a weird message from "him" again, i thinking of posting it here but is quite unfair to him if i do so. I am not feeling guilty to him, because i have tried my best to love him before (but he constantly think that i should feel guilty). Guy always like that, they will only ask for chances to treat you nicely after they lost you (He still blamming me never give him any chances, i wondering why he never blames himself for not treated me nice enough). I have no regret for left him. He is definitely the kind of guy that most of the girls wish to be his wife (for the girls who want to have a secure and beutiful future life). But for me, who always need love and caring, that's not enough. And i just found out that, i always wish to get present from him when we are being together, but y i never expect lulu give me any present? ya, because i need presents to replace all the caring and love from him. And, y i never appreciate all the presents he gave me? Because he never plan. He bought every thing which i told him i like but he never used his heart to plan anything for me. I always envy bout the fireworks he did plan for his friend and the other things he did plan for others. That's why presents are not enough to satisfied a women. Caring and love still the most important thing. I can't say that he did not love me and caring me before, but just the way he did can't really satisfied me. I do not want to critize him, he is still a nice guy. Just whatever he did now is really cant worked on me any more. I pitied him every time i received his message which cursing me and said something such as i will regret soon. But, the more i pitied him, the more he is pity. I don't think he likes the feeling of being pity also. Anyway, i did love him. *ofcoz i only love my lulu now...
jian drafted on 6:17 PM Wednesday, July 20, 2005 im lazy... lying on bed every morning thinking of excuses for not going to school. i don't want to face da reality because there are lot if assignments and tests waiting me to finished it every day, so sometimes i hope i can stay in dreams forever. i blame it as period's fault. i asked ngeeshin y only women have period... she gave me a nice answer... tat every women might like to hear that.. is because man can take care of us, though...
jian drafted on 8:49 AM Sunday, July 17, 2005 hehe.... today my hair's curls turn to bigger... so look like this...  hehe.... n guess wat.... yunnam's hair is growing...  jian drafted on 10:57 PM  i permed my hair yesterday... thank you... freddie.. jian drafted on 4:17 PM Tuesday, July 12, 2005 the sorrows of girls Why some of da girls so mean to each other? They act like they r good frens every day. Talk n talk n talk... They always cant finished their conversation on other people stuffs. Every one tot they r good frens, but actually they r not. They making each other suffer by "words", such as cause each other to feel self-conscious or ashamed. They have 2 faces. They enjoying da feeling of causing their frens sad. But they will become mad when they've got da "returns" from their frens.
Frankly, i don think they can consider "friend" to each other. I stay away from da "war" btwn them. But i feel bad every time they complain each other to me. Why they make their life so difficult? I love all my frens. I wont let them feel bad or sad. If i did, then i wil try my best to appologize. For me, fren is da one who sharing my happiness. Smile... my frens.... U don hav to bother wat she said if u not really care bout her... But ofcoz, I hate tat "chucky". All're her faults. We r living in peace without her. Im not going to take part in tat "war". But, i do wan to tell "chucky" tat "fuck off .. u bitch!!!". I told myself not to bother wat she did very long time ago. But if she does screw up "something important" for my frens, i swear i wont let her life easy. But one thing for sure, i wont act like we are good frens and treat her so nice. I dunno how to backbite people like what she always does, mayb im not smart enuff. But i luv my life and every thing surrounded me... tat's enuff. okie~ my frens... don b sad... jian drafted on 10:29 AM Sunday, July 10, 2005  ngeeshin & me took some pics yesterday... wif her arnold n my number10 husband... wif our flowers... n ofcoz wif yunnam (his hair is growing but at da wrong place... poor yunnam...) jian drafted on 4:51 PM Thursday, July 07, 2005 i feel quite moody and blur today... dunno y... mayb bcoz of da stress of midterm exams and assignments which coming soon... quite sad actually... but i hav no reason to b sad... n i even dunno y im sad... so i juz hide it... ngeeshin said mayb bcoz of da explosions at london.. but i m sad b4 i heard tat... n ofcoz it makes my mood worse... thanks to lulu... he is trying to make my mood better i know... although i dint really tell him... but i think he can feel it... (is quite amazing tat he always know wat im thinking and wat i going to do or say something...) im quite happy n touched when he said he can buy me tat "red angrying bear" if i wan... it makes me feel warm n i can feel tat he is trying to makes me happy... (as long as u luv me... tat's enuff... although i luv tat bear... but i cant let u buy it.. bcoz i know u waste too much money on me...) muackkzz... tomolo wil b fine... i luv every thing surrounded me... 
jian drafted on 10:03 PM Wednesday, July 06, 2005 fallen angels  another angel dead in front of my door this morning... i wondering y they always dead in front of my door... is there any cue? quite weird rite? y not in front of others door? i luv them... i hope to c them flying in front of my door rather than they die...  
jian drafted on 2:44 PM Tuesday, July 05, 2005 yunnam~ yunnam~ where's ur hair? im waiting..... hehe.... *im so sleepy edi... but stil hav to do assignment... =( jian drafted on 10:56 PM Sunday, July 03, 2005 babycool & yunnam Babycool guess wat? den den den den... we hav a fridge now... hehe... n we decided to call him "babycool"... from now on.. we can buy papaya n milk... thn our boobs wil bcome bigger... ngek ngek ngek ngek... dad said babycool can only use after 8 hours... coz dunno wat bla bla gas not balance when moving it... babycool's box slightly kills me when i put it onto da rack... anyway... babycool... welcome to our romantic n sweet room...    Yunnam his name is yunnam... hehe... he is botak now... let us c how's his hair grow after few days... guess y we called him yunnam? hehe... shh... don tell... can ask me anytime... he is actually babycool's bro... coz they came to our room in same day... kekekeke~ yunnam is hamsap... coz he keeps staring us n smiling... ngeeshin started to talk to him.. juz like how she talk to her arnold.. u can find out arnold on ngeeshin's blog... okie~ shud start design a hair style for yunnam... any idea? welcom to our room too.. yunnam... u look cute... =p 
jian drafted on 10:33 PM love mayb i juz cant believe there is a guy wil always luv me... i saw my frens... i saw my aunties n uncles... i have no confidence for being luv... i saw my aunties divorce wif their husband... i saw my uncle has few wifes... they always suffer... i saw my frens keep admiring other girls although they hav a perfect gf actually... i dint c luv... but i luv my family... i luv my frens... n ofcoz i luv him... im not doubting him... juz cant believe in luv... im sorry... n i wil try my best to not question lulu... muackkzzz... jian drafted on 11:19 AM i feel so sad now... coz i nvr tot tat lulu is suffering n feel tat i always doubt on him... im sorry... i juz insecure... i wil try my best to not doing tat again... i hate my self... im not a good girl friend... not worth for luv... but i do luv him... * mayb i shud go bang da wall n die... im hopeless... jian drafted on 1:04 AM Saturday, July 02, 2005 ngeeshin n me =) similarities btwn ngeeshin (my room mate) n me...
differences btwn us...
our room...  ngeeshin's site  jian's site...  * note: im so touched when lulu said he can drink salty coffee for me... hehe... but i wont let my lulu feel suffer... =) jian drafted on 4:14 PM Friday, July 01, 2005 salt in your coffee? like other romantic stories have been forwarding thousand times by email...
i saw this story... so touching... hehe... salty coffee... but i think this kind of guys r extinct... He met her on a party.She was so outstanding,many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him. At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised, but due to being polite,she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop,he was too nervousto say anything,she felt uncomfortable, shethought, please, let me go home.Suddenly he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee." Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red, but,still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously,"Why you have this hobby?". He replied,"When I was a little boy,I use to live near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea,just like the tasteof the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much, I miss my parents who are still living there". While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart.A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home,cares about home, has responsibility of home. Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family. That was a really nice talk,also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm,careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, then they lived a happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knewthat's the way he liked it. After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said: "My dearest,please forgive me, forgive my whole life lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee.Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life,but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything. Now I'm dying, Im afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth. I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste.But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you,I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is the biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again". Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her,"What's the taste of salty coffee?"."It's sweet", she replied. love is not to forget but to forgive not to see but understand anyway.. is juz a story... tat guy really a poor thing.. y don he tell her da truth after few years? but if he did... thn i wont put this story here... however... i stil luv my lulu... even he wont drink salty coffee or some thing disgusting for me... kekekeke... jian drafted on 10:35 PM personality test ngeeshin asked me to try this personality test... this is my result... wow... i nvr tot im such a nice person... kekekeke~ Your view on yourself: You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you. The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for: You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true. Your readiness to commit to a relationship: You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person. The seriousness of your love: You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with? Your views on education Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can. The right job for you: You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success. How do you view success: You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous. What are you most afraid of: You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel. Who is your true self: You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve. try it now!!! jian drafted on 6:51 PM |
jian
love her family
love her boy friend
love her friends
love watching tv show
love reading
love traveling
love sleeping
love flying
love flowers
love shopping
good girl (definitely)
trust her?
curious?
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